For parents with substance use disorders, the search for
recovery usually comes at the end of a very rough and painful
road. By the time a mother or father seeks help, the trust of
children and other family members may be lost. Emotional
bonds in the household have been severely damaged, if not
destroyed. Parents with drug or alcohol addiction are likely to
be experiencing guilt, shame, and remorse over the harm done
to their families. Yet in spite of all these obstacles, many
parents have recovered from substance abuse and managed to
rebuild their lives and reestablish trust with their children.
Nearly all parents who are challenged with addiction will
experience guilt and regret for their actions. Even if they know
that addiction is considered a chronic, progressive disease
rather than a moral failure, they may blame themselves for the
consequences of their substance abuse and torment themselves
over the impact that their actions have had on their children.
They may wonder whether they can continue to serve as role
models for their kids, and whether their children will respect or
trust them again. They may even wonder if their children still
love them.
There is no doubt that parental substance abuse can have a
devastating impact on the youngest members of a household.
Substance abuse can harm children in numerous ways,
including increased risks of injuries, neglect, and accidents.
Living with a substance-using parent also increases the risk that
a child will develop alcohol or drug addiction later in life.
How can parents face the consequences of addiction and move.
on to restore their lives and the lives of their children? Self-
acceptance isn’t easy, but it can be accomplished with the help
of an intensive treatment program that includes the following
core components.
In order to rebuild broken relationships and reestablish trust, all
members of the family will need to learn more effective
communication skills. Parents may need to learn how to set
boundaries for their children, while children and teenagers will
need to learn how to respond to those boundaries in a respectful
manner.
Issues of Abuse, Neglect, and Domestic Violence.
In addition to coping with the emotional repercussions of
addiction, parents may need to face the legal consequences of
child abuse and domestic violence. If verbal, physical, or
sexual abuse occurred while the parent was intoxicated, the
parent may face loss of custody and criminal prosecution. In
this case, legal counseling will be required, so that all of the
family members are aware of their rights and potential
outcomes. Parents should be aware that if therapists or
clinicians suspect the possibility of child abuse, they have an
obligation to protect the child against further harm.
To some degree, substance abuse distances all parents from
their children, imposing barriers to emotional bonding and
communication. Overcoming those barriers in sobriety is one
of the greatest challenges of recovery. Many parents state that
they feel like addiction made them strangers to their children and spouses.
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